Thoughts on January

I did a minimalist challenge for myself all January and I thought that is what this post would be about but then when I was crafting it in my puny little brain it completely changed to just shit I did in Jan.

Here ya go:

I did a few things that were cool in January.


Firstly I started off the year in the most wholesome way possible! With my best pals, driving around at 8pm buying a sewing machine off a drunk lady (hi Emma) from a swap and sell page in order to learn how to sew and make underwear. We also played the “fire kitchen” game on ps4 and ate homemade cinnamon rolls which put me in a gluten coma.

Malcolm then got a stomach ulcer and we spent all of new years day in Emergency trying to sort him out. He ended up on a drip with a million different things in it.

I always have new years resolutions. And the truth is: I always follow them through. One year it was to start washing my face nightly. TICK. I still do it 5 years on. Last year it was to not buy any new clothes TICK I wanna write a blog about that. This year it is learn how to sew. I have found a lady who is going to teach me for only $20 a class!!!! I’m soooo excited.

I have a few more little things to do which include: yoga twice a week, meditation once a week, save and buy a fucking car codii you dickhead, keep on with recovering and try to get to a stage where I can moderately exercise and not spend the next week bedridden.

I started off this year calorie counting because I stepped on the scales for the first time in 6 months and was brutally fucking shocked. Calorie counting lasted a few days. I had a headache, felt weak af and sooo miserable. Then mum convinced me I was being a fuckwit (which I already knew) and I went back to eating as I do. DUMBEST IDEA 2018. Don’t ever do it. The fact that I now know how many fucking calories a spoon of olive oil has is ridiculous. Except now I pour it by the fucktonne with the joy of someone who DOES WHAT THEY WANT.

Update: I still haven’t tried a domino’s vegan cheese pizza yet. This may disturb some of you.

Oh also, my sister has been down for three weeks for xmas and new years and we had the most wholesome lunch w mum. My sister and I do not get along. We went to bali for two weeks together randomly and before we even got on the plane we were both messaging and calling mum to vent about what a cunt the other person is. BUT. This miracle shone down upon us and we didn’t fight once!!!! Is this adulthood? I even said to mum that I didn’t want her to leave because it was so enjoyable having her around. Tysha, if you’re reading this, get fucked, that last sentence is a lie.

Another highlight was that I randomly put up a post in a fb unconsuming group asking for friends HAHAAHAAH (the best way an introvert knows how to make friends). Probably about 100 people replied to my post telling me about themselves and about how they’ve also wanted to make friends but didn’t know how. It’s fucking unreal the amount of people in the same position as you when you reach out!!! I went to coffee with the drunk lady I bought that sewing machine off on new years eve HAHAHAAHAHAH she has been roasting me on fb about how I can’t sew and shit ever since I bought it and then responded to my friends post. I spent 2 WHOLE HOURS over coffee just chating non stop!!!!! I couldn’t believe it. I was a tiny bit nervous about the friend date. What if we had nothing to talk about or nothing in common? FUCK THAT NOISE. We had sooo much in common and we’re both hilarious legends (who got sunburnt sitting in the shade). I’m feeling sooo wholesome and meeting new people is the married af person’s version of dating, I feel.

Speaking of having things in common with strangers!!! I’m reading Desmond Tutu and the Dalai Lama’s book on joy or something. It was published in 2016 and it’s amazing so far! Two amazing minds coming together to speak on topics. AHHHHHH. Anyway, one thing I’m finding soooo interesting is that both agree that the way to cultivate joy and live a more wholesome life is to think about other people more often. Sounds so weird, I know. But then it started to make sense. They were saying that we feel most alone when we focus on ourselves and what we’re going through. If we think on a bigger level of how many people are going through exactly what we’re going through (or worse) we start to feel connected. The Dalai Lama was saying that when he was younger he’d go in to speeches or meetings or WHATEVER thinking about how he was a buddhist monk, male, age, ETC and he felt isolated like no one else was like him. But now he goes into everything thinking he is just one of 7 billion people and it makes him feel waaaayy more approachable and normal and like part of a community.

I cannot relate more to that! At the peak of my depression all I did was obsess over how I felt and how alone I was. No one could understand what I was going through and it was just me in this big black whole of shit and hate and terrifying thoughts. Then I started to read up on Buddhism for the first time and it’s all about focusing on the moment and the interconnectedness of humanity. I was soooooo anxious that I thought that when I had to go out somewhere I’d focus purely on my surroundings. A big part of this was observing other people on the train and walking on footpaths and stuff, since this was where I was a lot of my time. I noticed something, a lot actually. No one looked happy, no one was smiling, no one was particularly enjoying themselves. In fact, so many people looked stressed/concerned/worried/tired/lonely and I started to relate so hard to them. Mentally I would be like “fuck stranger I feel exactly how you feel, you’re not alone.” If I was mentally telling a stranger they weren’t alone because I felt the same way didn’t that mean that I wasn’t alone too? REVELATION TO THE MAX!!!

Once I started to feel empathy for my fellow human pals surrounding me I felt so much better. Not better in the sense of less depressed or sad. It was more a sigh of relief that I wasn’t actually the only one experiencing certain emotions and thoughts. I came to the conclusion that everyone is going through some fucked up shit and trying their best to act normal in the face of it. WOW!! That was me too!!1 See!! not alone! interconnected!!

Clearly this book is giving me A LOT to think about.

Another thing that has been giving me A LOT to think about is Oprah’s Soulful conversation podcast or whatever it’s called. Malcolm hates it because he says Oprah is a cunt but cannot articulate why he thinks that. One night I was sooo feelin myself and decided to listen to her podcast while I cooked dinner. It was about mindful eating or some bullshit. I almost turned it off because it was such hippy bullshit about how you should only eat for nourishment and to really look in to why you wanna eat what you wanna eat. Like are you feeling sad and masking emotions with food? Why do you wanna eat that chocolate cake. UTTER BULLSHIT. I’ll eat all the chocolate I want, thank you. I didn’t give up because I ain’t a quitter and I’m so glad. It all started to tie and make much more sense. I do actually agree with what the lady was saying. I think it’s always a good idea to try and understand your motivations behind things. She was saying how women have so much guilt around food and that really we should not because food is about nourishing our bodies. It was a self-love type of thing. I can’t really explain it but go and listen and tell me what you think.

Surprisingly, it was actually Oprah the OG herself that said something that just got me!!! You know when you hear something and it just clicks like WOW. Yes. WOW. That happened! They were talking about gratitude and about how it’s nice to practice it by writing down things in a journal you’re blessed for but like??? who has time, who actually does that? ME. I DO. Anyway, she said an even better way to practice gratitude is to just stop once or twice a day and ask yourself “what is going right?”

IT CAN’T BE THAT EASY?????????? Well, it can folks! I’ve actually started doing it and it’s sooooo much easier to come up with a massive list of shit you’re grateful for when you pose a question like that. Right now, what’s going right for me? I ate a wholesome dinner, I had a day off to relax, my body isn’t tight cos I just did yoga, my love is laying in bed on his laptop and I can see him from my position at the dining table, our whole house is closed up and it’s still the perfect temperature, we’re about to get a well deserved storm and the rain will make me sleep sooo good, it’s a blue moon and we won’t see it because of the storm but the internet exists!!, I’m looking at a bunch of flowers mum gave me for my birthday and then over the weekend she collected flowers from my garden to add to the bunch.

SEEEEE!!!!!!!!! what I mean!!!! If I asked myself 5 things I’m grateful for today I’d really be trying to think of grand moments that pop out. But I had absolutely no troubles furiously typing that list above as it all came rushing through my mind after asking what’s going right?

I also met Malcolm’s parents on the weekend and that went soooo good.

Lastly, I’ve been working so much. Probably to the detriment to my health. Well, that’s definitely the case but I just got paid and seeing that much money in my account to get that damn car I need is sooooo satisfying. My manager broke her arm and hasn’t been able to work so I’ve been capitalising on her pain and taking on all the hours I can at the moment while they are there. When she comes back I’ll have no hours again. I’m also back supervising exams for a fucktonne of money so that’s nice.

Mainly, this January has been so wholesome and I’ve LOVED it. The tiredness of being over-worked is a big bit of shit but besides that I’ve just had an amazing month.

Let me know how you’re doing my friends, tell me your resolutions!!, show me pictures of you engaged in wholesome activities. I wanna share in all your wholesome glory x


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